Dopey: On the Dark Comedy of Drug Addiction

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This week on Dopey’s Greatest Hits! Long Island recovery legend Smiling Joe takes us through four decades of drugs, crime, chaos, and finding a way out. From drinking and sniffing glue as a kid in Queens to taking acid on the roof of JFK Airport, shooting heroin, stealing diamond rings, and plotting a $30 million gold theft on Wall Street—Joe’s story is absolutely fucking unbelievable.
We hear about getting arrested over a stolen girdle, kicking heroin in jail, surviving Rikers Island, and dating a mob-connected man’s daughter. Her father first chased Joe with a gun, then became his friend—and later decided against bringing Joe on a ride that ended with the man being killed. Somehow, Joe also went from Rikers to St. John’s University, became an A student, and reinvented himself as Disco Joe before heroin and cocaine took over again.
But the heart of this episode is how “Methadone Joe” became Smiling Joe. After years of rehabs, relentless using, and going to meetings high, Joe finally found a recovery he could live in. We talk about powerlessness, surrender, borrowing a loving God, and replacing the feeling in the needle with connection, service, and real love. Plus, Dave shares how Joe helped him feel welcome in recovery after Chris died.
PLUS! Austin’s Rainbow Gathering voicemail involves boofing LSD, a blackout, and a search for his missing pants. Listener reactions to John Joseph, a Dopey studio update, and much more!
All that and more on the Dopey Smiling Joe Greatest Hits Episode!

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This week on Dopey! Interventionist Keith Fierman brings a lifetime of unbelievable drug stories, rock-and-roll adventures, and hard-earned recovery. From taking acid with Jerry Garcia, Phil Lesh, and Owsley Stanley to secretly flying from Alabama to New York, stuffing his socks with heroin, and getting home like he’d spent the day at work—Keith lived two very different lives. And when he finally asked for help, he spent five days wandering a treatment center before staff admitted they hadn’t actually checked him in.
Behind the backstage passes is a powerful story of childhood abuse, finding safety in heroin, and fighting to build a different life. Keith talks about relentless cravings in early sobriety, telling God “fuck you,” and the bowling trip that finally gave him a little peace. Plus, a runaway doctor demanding a naked woman on a horse, Keith Richards, an unexpected meeting with Ringo Starr in France, and why families shouldn’t have to wait for someone to hit bottom.
PLUS! JD D. Hart finds a bag of drugs at work and turns it in, listener comments on gambling and process addictions, and Dave and Keith get into the ongoing saga of getting Trey Anastasio on Dopey. Is Dopey too dark—or is finding laughter and connection in the darkness exactly the point?
All that and much more on this old school dose of brand new Dopey!

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This week on Dopey Tuesday! Ray returns, the headphones suck, and Dave’s attempt to sell Patreon immediately backfires when Ray reveals he pays two dollars a month and still thinks there are too many ads.
We revisit Ben’s unforgettable Snickers story, autographed candy bars, and the mechanics of a pierced penis before Alan joins us for his official DopeyCon review. Naturally, this becomes an argument about whether he threw away Dave’s framed posters, why photographs of Canadian tunnels get wall space, and why Dave still doesn’t know how to end a show. Plus: Ray’s suspiciously heartfelt stagecraft, Tony O’Neill, fantasy basketball draft disasters, diabolical Seymour, and gambling apps tempting Ray for all the wrong reasons.
THEN! Dave reveals that his Thursday started with questioning by three LAPD detectives and ended at Gary Dell’Abate’s vinyl party. For that story, the Heart Attack Doug comments, and the rest of the stories, join us on Patreon!
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This week on Dopey Total Replay! Dave and Chris return with a classic early episode featuring a cigarette dispute outside Katz’s, a dope-sick heroin run in a ridiculous wig, and a police officer who ate confiscated weed brownies and called 911 because he thought he was dead.
Dave loses his shit when Ezra—the neighborhood character he’s supplied with countless cigarettes—refuses to run to the store for him. There are threats, wounded pride, and an incredibly petty half-cigarette power move. Chris attempts to broker peace.
Then listener Tracy delivers an incredible story about buying heroin in a terrible black wig, getting pulled over with the drugs in the glove compartment, and a driver who decides this is the perfect moment to flirt with the cop. Plus, Chris remembers drinking with people on the street in Boston, surviving on stolen beef jerky and tallboys, and his family dog stealing somebody’s sandwich.
We also get into how Dave and Chris met at Mountainside, how their friendship changed in recovery, Bob Marley–induced weed cravings, eighteen hours of “Natural Mystic,” and the difference between missing getting high and being able to go back.
PLUS! In a new introduction, Dave remembers Bobby R., a beloved member of his recovery community, launches the Dopey Worst Recovery Texts Contest, reads your comments, and explains why this episode remains one of his favorites.
All that and More on a brand new version of a super classic old episode of that good old dopey show,

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This week on Dopey! Betty Guadagno brings a completely fucking staggering story of drugs, family trauma, sex work, and finding recovery after an overdose that she describes as a trip to the other side. Raised by drug-addicted, hustling parents who stole Christmas presents and fled to Las Vegas, Betty discovered meth at fifteen—and things only got crazier from there.
Betty opens up about losing both parents to suicide, moving back to New York to retrace their love story, selling drugs behind the bar, and turning to sex work to pay the rent. We get into heroin, crack, methadone, a $20,000 marriage, getting arrested during the Hurricane Sandy blackout, and a meth relapse that sent her into a world of paranoia, imagined bugs, and exploiting other women to support her addiction.
Then comes the bathroom-floor overdose, the life review, and the spiritual experience Betty believes changed everything. We talk about hearing her father’s voice, drug dealers finding Jesus, following a stranger on the J train to a meeting, and the woman whose hug finally helped her surrender. Plus: tiny men mowing her brain out of heroin withdrawal, Gabby Bernstein, A Course in Miracles, UFOs, and Dave trying to get a sign from his mother.
PLUS! Squirrel’s spectacular GHB-and-ketamine mistaken-identity voicemail, sex addiction, kratom and 7-OH, a listener’s 22-day meth run, DopeyCon feedback, and the ongoing debate over recording at Alan’s apartment versus a fancy studio.
All that and much more on a deeply dark, strangely funny, and very spiritual new episode of that good old Dopey show!

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