Hopestream: Parenting Kids Through Addiction & Mental Health

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
Tough love. Two words that get thrown around constantly in the addiction world, and yet nobody can quite agree on what they mean. Kick them out. Cut them off. Save yourself. That’s the version I heard early on, and I couldn’t do it. Not because I was too soft, but because something about it felt fundamentally wrong - especially with a teenager.
In this episode, Cathy and I get practical on the topic of this illusive thing called “tough love.” We walk through the nine actual actions we took with our own kids, in order, from the very first steps all the way to the hardest ones (ones we call “strong love”) as a way of demonstrating action, not theories. Just two moms who were figuring it out as we went, without the language, community or support we needed at the time.
YOU’LL LEARN:
What Dr. Gabor Maté said about tough love that stopped me cold
Why I stopped using the phrase “tough love” and what I call it instead
Nine “strong love” actions Cathy and I took with our own kids, and what we wish we had done differently
The thing every person in recovery has told me about what finally changed things for them
The two books I recommend to every parent, no matter where you are in this
EPISODE RESOURCES:
Heather Hayes on Hopestream episode 111
Mary Crocker Cook on Hopestream episode 223
Jessica Lahey on Hopestream episode 163
Trish Ruggles on Hopestream episode 313
Safe Enough To Change course in Hopestream Community’s Limited Membership
This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
When I first heard about a woodworking apprenticeship as an addiction recovery program, I was skeptical. And then I sat down with Jeremy French, founder of Making Whole in Asheville, North Carolina, and everything I thought I knew about what recovery has to look like got turned on its head. 
Jeremy got sober at 17 after stolen cars, drug runs to Florida, and a flop house he describes as straight out of a Netflix series. He's been in recovery nearly 30 years, never finished high school, and built one of the most remarkable programs I've come across. A small group of men of all ages build high-end furniture together, share a daily meal, and are never forced to stay. 
Of the 55 men who've graduated from Making Whole since 2018, 30 of them will tell you they are exactly where they want to be today. That is not a number you hear in this space. I was so intrigued.
You'll hear about:
Why Jeremy credits drugs with solving nine out of ten problems in his life while he was using, and what that might mean for your child
The two things true in every recovery success story Jeremy has witnessed, without exception
The decision his parents made that changed his life more than anything else
Why stepping back sends a different message than you think
What addiction is actually solving, and why treating it as the problem keeps everyone stuck
What parents who have lost a child would give anything to do, and what that could mean for you right now
EPISODE RESOURCES: 
Making Whole website
This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE:
This solo episode is my attempt to provide answers to the question of why some families see greater change than others when using the CRAFT approach. Drawing on 6+ years of watching hundreds of parents move through this process, some gaining traction, some spinning their wheels, I’m sharing the 10 most common reasons why parents who are 'doing the work' aren't getting the results they want. It's a no-fluff audit of what might be holding you back, and it comes from my heart because there are no more important results to strive for than a healthy family.
If you've been at this for a while and feel like things aren't moving in the right direction, this one is for you.
You'll hear about:
A foundational piece most parents skip without realizing it
Why doing more often backfires
A timing factor that determines whether any skill works
The fastest path forward when communication has broken down
Why inconsistency isn't a character flaw
EPISODE RESOURCES:
Hopestream Playlists - Start Here Playlist
Jennifer Ollis Blomqvist on using Motivational Interviewing, Hopestream episode 306
Dr. Emily Kline on using Motivational Interviewing for hard conversations, Hopestream episode 160
Using Motivational Interviewing and CRAFT as a double punch effort to create change in your family, Hopestream episode 256
CRAFT family resources and providers with Helping Families Help
Using CRAFT, MI and Acceptance & Commitment Therapy together to help your child, Hopestream episode 260
Stages of Change workshop
Stages of Change downloadable cheat-sheet here
 Hopestream podcast episode 66 on the Stages of Change
This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE: 
When parents hear "wilderness therapy," their minds often race to worst-case scenarios: punishment, boot camps, kids forced to survive in harsh conditions. But Trish Ruggles, who spent over a decade as a field guide and wilderness therapist before becoming an educational consultant, has a different story to tell. After 21 years in the field and working with countless families through Pathfinder Consulting, Trish knows that wilderness therapy has evolved dramatically from its origins.
What makes wilderness therapy effective isn't the outdoor skills or fresh air - though those certainly help. It's magic lies in the complete removal of 'noise.' 
When you take a struggling adolescent out of their always-on life and place them in the wilderness, the volume goes down on everything that keeps them from thriving. No bedroom door to close, no delivery apps to summon food, no distractions to buffer the work of actually facing themselves. And there are immediate, natural consequences their adolescent brain can actually understand.
Trish's approach is refreshingly honest and practical. She'll be the first to tell you wilderness therapy isn't for everyone, but for the kid who's stuck in their room, the one running wild in the streets, or the treatment-experienced individual who knows how to game the residential system, wilderness creates something that can't be replicated indoors: a space where you can't phone it in, where every action impacts your group, and where real-life consequences teach more than any lecture ever could.
You'll learn:
Key myths and facts about today's outdoor behavioral health offerings
The critical, natural consequences that wilderness experiences provide in real-time
How wilderness has evolved from its primitive roots
Why adopted kids and those with attachment challenges often thrive in wilderness despite parents' fears
The truth about getting kids to agree to, and actually go to an outdoor, adventure or wilderness program
EPISODE RESOURCES:
Website Trish Ruggles 
Trish on Hopestream episode 202 
Will White’s Hopestream podcast episode 14 
This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.

ABOUT THE EPISODE: 
When Campbell Manning's middle son entered detox the day before Valentine's Day, she genuinely believed he'd be "fixed" and home within a week. What followed instead was a years-long journey through both of her sons' addiction cycles that would ultimately transform her from a completely naive parent into a trained addiction counselor who now helps hundreds of families navigate the same treacherous terrain. 
Campbell brings both the raw authenticity of lived experience and the clinical expertise she's gained through extensive education plus real-world training with Amber Hollingsworth (Put The Shovel Down YouTube Channel) at Hope For Families Recovery Center.
 In this potent conversation, she speaks directly to the particular torture of watching your child actively harm themselves while grappling with decisions that feel impossible, like when her 14-year-old daughter confronted her about how much more "time, emotion, money, and energy" she was going to give to addiction. 
What I love is that Campbell's wisdom isn't theoretical; it's forged from setting boundaries that ended up with her sons leave home at 17, refusing to enable behavior that was metastasizing through her entire family system, and learning that "over-loving" your child can actually be the most deleterious choice you make. Her message offers genuine hope grounded in reality: both her sons are in long-term recovery, and she's built a thriving coaching practice helping parents understand that their child's willingness to change often arrives in fleeting moments, which means your preparation and readiness matters profoundly. 
You'll learn: 
How Campbell navigated the brutal reality of having two sons in active  addiction, including the crucial difference between heartbreak (first son) and fury (second son) in her emotional responses 
The concept of "tagging it on" and why your child must truly understand there's no one coming to rescue them before lasting change becomes possible 
Why disenfranchised grief - the kind that receives no casseroles, no sympathy cards, no community support, coagulates within families dealing with addiction and impacts every member, especially siblings 
How Campbell's daughter's confrontation about "how much more are you going to give addiction, Mom?" catalyzed her understanding that setting strong, healthy boundaries isn't abandonment, it's the most loving thing you can do when your child is drowning 
EPISODE RESOURCES:
Hope For Families Recovery Center website 
Put The Shovel Down YouTube Channel 
This podcast is part of a nonprofit called Hopestream Community
Get our free, 4-video course, Hope Starts Here, and access to our Limited Membership here
Learn about The Stream, our private online community for moms
Find us on Instagram here
Watch the podcast on YouTube here
Download a free e-book, Worried Sick: A Compassionate Guide For Parents When Your Teen or Young Adult Child Misuses Drugs and Alcohol

Hopestream Community is a registered 501(c)3 nonprofit organization and an Amazon Associate. We may make a small commission if you purchase from our links.