Deep Within with Marina Triner, The Compassionate Somatic Coach

Two years ago I went through what I can only describe as a dark night of the soul. Divorce, financial loss, estrangement, war in the countries I am from, and the slow drifting of family. And recently — something has shifted. A profound sense of aliveness has returned to me that I had not felt in a very long time.
In this episode I want to talk honestly about how I got here, because for those of you with complex trauma and dysfunctional family dynamics, this is not a story of one day everything was fine. It is a story of layers dying, of shame being felt all the way through, of co-regulation, somatic resources, and the moment I decided I would not allow my childhood to rob me of my life. I also share what I have been doing practically — dancing, nature, breath, sound and movement — and why aliveness is not something you can force, but something you come back to through the body. 

WORK WITH ME 1:1:
❥Softening into self- 3 month 1:1 with Whats App Support: https://marina-yt.mykajabi.com/offers/PAWQhZHu
❥❥1:1 Coaching with me: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfWcZM5s9c2OjOLwoGMI5jE6rh_JAzjN2d_vCtuVe7e3pVGxw/viewform
DOWNLOAD FOR FREE:
Stay or Go: 5 Clarity Questions to Reconnect with Your Inner Knowing: https://marinatriner.com/stay-or-go-guide

Attatchment Practice: Discover the actual blocks beneath the surface so you can actually have the deep intimacy you crave: https://marinatriner.com/attachment-practice 

Connect & Ground: 10 Incredible Somatic Practices for Nervous System Regulation: https://marinatriner.com/connect-and-ground

Alive & Aligned: 7 Embodiment Practices For Self Connection: https://marinatriner.com/alive-and-aligned

Trigger to Rooted: A step by step process of working with your triggers: https://marinatriner.com/trigger-2-rooted 

VIEW MY COURSES & RESOURCES:
https://marinatriner.com/resources 

CONNECT WITH  ME:
Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/marinatriner/ 
Subscribe to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@marinatriner 

Top Episode Quotes:
"The point of being alive is to feel aliveness. If I don't feel alive, what is the point of going through everything we go through?" — Marina
"I will not allow my childhood dysfunction to rob me of my legacy. I will not allow anything in my life to rob me of my life." — Marina
"On the surface, so many overachievers look really good. But on the inside there is very deep pain — and they don't feel like they can just pause and take in life." — Marina
"Feeling the pain from a place of safety means you have enough capacity and space in your body to be with painful things — and know it is okay." — Marina
"You deserve to feel good. You deserve the lightness. You deserve to feel great on this planet merely because you exist." — Marina

somatic healing, nervous system regulation, trauma healing, complex trauma, dark night of the soul, shame healing, inner child work, emotional regulation, self trust, burnout recovery, survival mode, people pleasing, perfectionism and trauma, aliveness and joy, co-regulation, disconfirming experiences, embodiment, deep within podcast, Marina Triner, somatic coaching

In this episode I sit down with Colette Fehr, licensed psychotherapist, couples therapist, and author of The Cost of Quiet: How to Have the Hard Conversations That Create Secure, Lasting Love, whose 2025 TEDx talk Secrets of a Couples Therapist was selected as a TED Editors' Pick and whose work has been featured in The New York Times, Oprah Daily, and The Wall Street Journal. Colette makes such a compelling case for why avoiding conflict is not keeping the peace — it is costing us our relationships, our sense of self, and our emotional freedom. We talk about the neurobiological reason hard conversations feel so dangerous, what a healthy apology actually sounds like, how to identify your needs when you have spent years not having any, and how to soothe your inner child before you ever say a word to someone else.
This conversation is going to change the way you think about conflict — and I think you are going to feel that shift in your body as you listen.
Connect with Colette:
www.colettejanefehr.com
www.instgram.com/colettejanefehr
Book: www.thecostofquiet.com
Substack: www.colettejanefehr.substack.com
Podcast: www.insightsfromthecouch.org

WORK WITH ME 1:1:
❥Softening into self- 3 month 1:1 with Whats App Support: https://marina-yt.mykajabi.com/offers/PAWQhZHu
❥❥1:1 Coaching with me: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfWcZM5s9c2OjOLwoGMI5jE6rh_JAzjN2d_vCtuVe7e3pVGxw/viewform
DOWNLOAD FOR FREE:
Stay or Go: 5 Clarity Questions to Reconnect with Your Inner Knowing: https://marinatriner.com/stay-or-go-guide

Attatchment Practice: Discover the actual blocks beneath the surface so you can actually have the deep intimacy you crave: https://marinatriner.com/attachment-practice 

Connect & Ground: 10 Incredible Somatic Practices for Nervous System Regulation: https://marinatriner.com/connect-and-ground

Alive & Aligned: 7 Embodiment Practices For Self Connection: https://marinatriner.com/alive-and-aligned

Trigger to Rooted: A step by step process of working with your triggers: https://marinatriner.com/trigger-2-rooted 

VIEW MY COURSES & RESOURCES:
https://marinatriner.com/resources 

CONNECT WITH  ME:
Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/marinatriner/ 
Subscribe to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@marinatriner 

Top Episode Quotes:
"Conflict might just mean someone stepped on an old wound — and now you have the opportunity to heal, to be known more deeply, and to feel more connected." — Colette Fehr
"Your voice deserves to be spoken. Your needs matter. We get sick physically and mentally when we are not clear and honest." — Colette Fehr
"It is never about the dishes. It is about the old wounds, the insecurities we carry inside. We are all, as human beings, afraid of abandonment and rejection." — Colette Fehr
"Vulnerability naturally invites vulnerability. We have mirror neurons — when we come forward this way, people start to open up and be on that same channel without even thinking about it." — Colette Fehr
"How you talk to yourself first sets you up for success. You have to tend to your inner child before you communicate with anyone else." — Colette Fehr

somatic healing, nervous system regulation, trauma healing, hard conversations, attachment healing, inner child work, emotional regulation, relational healing, self worth, people pleasing, self abandonment, codependency healing, self compassion, conflict and connection, secure attachment, boundaries, deep within podcast, Colette Fehr, cost of quiet, couples therapy

Every once in a while you speak to someone whose story just shakes you to the core. Brian Pennie is a former heroin addict turned doctor of neuroscience and psychology, a lecturer at Trinity College Dublin, an author, an award-winning TV presenter, and the founder of Change is Possible. He lost 15 years of his life to addiction before a near-death seizure became the moment everything shifted — and what followed was one of the most profound awakenings I have heard anyone describe. In this conversation we talk about surrender, the fear of anxiety versus anxiety itself, breathwork as a daily practice, the paradox of connection, and what it means to find your other self through the greatest challenges of your life.
I recorded this intro with an open heart and I think you will feel that as you listen.
Connect with Brian:
http://www.brianpennie.com
https://www.instagram.com/brianpennie78/
https://www.youtube.com/@brianpenniephd1073

WORK WITH ME 1:1:
❥Softening into self- 3 month 1:1 with Whats App Support: https://marina-yt.mykajabi.com/offers/PAWQhZHu
❥❥1:1 Coaching with me: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfWcZM5s9c2OjOLwoGMI5jE6rh_JAzjN2d_vCtuVe7e3pVGxw/viewform
DOWNLOAD FOR FREE:
Stay or Go: 5 Clarity Questions to Reconnect with Your Inner Knowing: https://marinatriner.com/stay-or-go-guide

Attatchment Practice: Discover the actual blocks beneath the surface so you can actually have the deep intimacy you crave: https://marinatriner.com/attachment-practice 

Connect & Ground: 10 Incredible Somatic Practices for Nervous System Regulation: https://marinatriner.com/connect-and-ground

Alive & Aligned: 7 Embodiment Practices For Self Connection: https://marinatriner.com/alive-and-aligned

Trigger to Rooted: A step by step process of working with your triggers: https://marinatriner.com/trigger-2-rooted 

VIEW MY COURSES & RESOURCES:
https://marinatriner.com/resources 

CONNECT WITH  ME:
Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/marinatriner/ 
Subscribe to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@marinatriner 

Top Episode Quotes:
"I fundamentally believed I needed drugs to be able to live in the world. Changing that belief — that anxiety is just information, and I have a tool to work with it — changed everything." — Brian Pennie
"Surrender is not passive. When you're stuck in the mud, you don't stay stuck. You surrender to the reality of it — and then you ask what you can do about it." — Brian Pennie
"Be true to your wonderfully weird self. You'll attract what you need and repel what you don't." — Brian Pennie
"Saying no is trading popularity for respect. When I say yes to that thing, I am saying no to something else — and that has been the biggest tool for me." — Brian Pennie
"The greatest gift I have ever been given has been the trauma and the addiction — because it gave me the joy, the awareness and the mindset I have today." — Brian Pennie

trauma healing, nervous system regulation, somatic healing, addiction recovery, surrender and healing, breathwork, inner child work, emotional regulation, self trust, burnout recovery, survival mode, attachment healing, connection and co-regulation, embodiment, neuroscience and healing, anxiety healing, deep within podcast, Brian Pennie, change is possible, complex trauma

In this episode I sit down with Wendy Behary, one of the world's leading experts on narcissism with over 30 years of experience, founder of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey, and author of the international bestseller Disarming the Narcissist, selected by Oprah Daily as one of the top books on the subject and now in its third edition translated into 18 languages. Wendy cuts through the myths that flood the internet around narcissism, explains the real difference between narcissistic traits and narcissistic personality disorder, and shares what she has learned from three decades of sitting in the room with both narcissists and the people who love them. We talk about when to stay, when to leave, what healing actually looks like for a narcissist, how to build your healthy adult self, and how to regulate your nervous system when you are living in close proximity to someone deeply volatile.
This is one of the most clear, grounded, and genuinely rare conversations I have had on this topic,and I learned an enormous amount.
Connect with Wendy:
https://www.instagram.com/donsanddivas
https://disarmingthenarcissist.com/
https://www.schematherapytrainingonline.com/p/empathic-confrontation-wendy-behary
https://courses.schematherapytrainingonline.com/p/empathic-confrontation-wendy-behary

WORK WITH ME 1:1:
❥Softening into self- 3 month 1:1 with Whats App Support: https://marina-yt.mykajabi.com/offers/PAWQhZHu
❥❥1:1 Coaching with me: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfWcZM5s9c2OjOLwoGMI5jE6rh_JAzjN2d_vCtuVe7e3pVGxw/viewform
DOWNLOAD FOR FREE:
Stay or Go: 5 Clarity Questions to Reconnect with Your Inner Knowing: https://marinatriner.com/stay-or-go-guide

Attatchment Practice: Discover the actual blocks beneath the surface so you can actually have the deep intimacy you crave: https://marinatriner.com/attachment-practice 

Connect & Ground: 10 Incredible Somatic Practices for Nervous System Regulation: https://marinatriner.com/connect-and-ground

Alive & Aligned: 7 Embodiment Practices For Self Connection: https://marinatriner.com/alive-and-aligned

Trigger to Rooted: A step by step process of working with your triggers: https://marinatriner.com/trigger-2-rooted 

VIEW MY COURSES & RESOURCES:
https://marinatriner.com/resources 

CONNECT WITH  ME:
Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/marinatriner/ 
Subscribe to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@marinatriner 

Top Episode Quotes:
"It's not your fault that you are the way you are — but it is your responsibility, if you want to be responsible, to work on this." — Wendy Behary
"You don't have to be angry all the time to justify your position. The best place we can get ourselves to is solid, steady conviction." — Wendy Behary
"Narcissists don't sit there plotting to hurt you. They are acting in defense of their ego — and they will run you over to protect it, but that is a different thing." — Wendy Behary
"When you're in your healthy adult mode, what would that part of you say about this? That's always the question I bring people back to." — Wendy Behary
"The grandiosity is a masquerade. It is covering the shame. All of it is a compensation for feeling deeply insecure at the core." — Wendy Behary

narcissism, trauma healing, nervous system regulation, somatic healing, narcissistic abuse recovery, attachment healing, schema therapy, inner child work, emotional regulation, relational healing, people pleasing, self abandonment, codependency healing, self worth, healthy adult self, trauma bonding, complex trauma, deep within podcast, Wendy Behary, disarming the narcissist

If you've ever sat across from someone you care about and felt your body go on high alert, unsure whether you're in danger or just remembering what danger used to feel like, this conversation is for you. I sat down with Amy Fiedler, Certified Trauma Support Specialist and relationship educator who has helped more than 2,000 clients worldwide understand how past trauma continues to shape their relationships, to talk about hypervigilance: how to recognize it, how to work with it, and how to finally tell the difference between an old wound and a present-day reality.
Amy and I get into how relational trauma quietly pulls us toward what's familiar instead of what's good for us, how to identify the values that can actually guide our choices, and what it really takes, beyond a quick "I'm sorry," to repair trust after rupture. This one is honest, practical, and full of permission for anyone who's ever been told they're too much.
Connect with Amy:
https://amyfiedler.com/
https://www.instagram.com/amythelifecoach/
https://www.tiktok.com/@amythelifecoach
https://www.threads.com/@amythelifecoach

WORK WITH ME 1:1:
❥Softening into self- 3 month 1:1 with Whats App Support: https://marina-yt.mykajabi.com/offers/PAWQhZHu
❥❥1:1 Coaching with me: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfWcZM5s9c2OjOLwoGMI5jE6rh_JAzjN2d_vCtuVe7e3pVGxw/viewform
DOWNLOAD FOR FREE:
Stay or Go: 5 Clarity Questions to Reconnect with Your Inner Knowing: https://marinatriner.com/stay-or-go-guide

Attatchment Practice: Discover the actual blocks beneath the surface so you can actually have the deep intimacy you crave: https://marinatriner.com/attachment-practice 

Connect & Ground: 10 Incredible Somatic Practices for Nervous System Regulation: https://marinatriner.com/connect-and-ground

Alive & Aligned: 7 Embodiment Practices For Self Connection: https://marinatriner.com/alive-and-aligned

Trigger to Rooted: A step by step process of working with your triggers: https://marinatriner.com/trigger-2-rooted 

VIEW MY COURSES & RESOURCES:
https://marinatriner.com/resources 

CONNECT WITH  ME:
Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/marinatriner/ 
Subscribe to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/@marinatriner 

Top Episode Quotes:
"What's familiar seems safe in our heads, but familiar and safe are not the same thing." - Amy Fiedler
"You are never asking for too much. Unless you're asking for something like a hundred thousand dollars a day, in terms of our emotional needs, that's very different." - Amy Fiedler
"The minute you catch yourself eliminating the ands, I want more communication, and I'm okay if I don't always get it right, that shows you growth." - Amy Fiedler
"We don't fully heal and move on to the next thing. It's a part of you. It's created what you want now. So lean into that." - Amy Fiedler
"If they don't know why they did it or said it, there's no chance at them changing it. There's none." - Amy Fiedler

hypervigilance, relational trauma, nervous system regulation, trauma healing, attachment healing, self trust, boundaries, codependency, relationship values, survival mode, somatic healing, inner child healing, self worth, apology and accountability, trust rebuilding, emotional regulation, trauma informed relationships, deep within podcast, Amy Fiedler