The Imperfects

What impact does sleep deprivation really have on your wellbeing? What about your parenting? What about your identity?
Matt D’Avella has amassed over 4 millions subscribers on YouTube undertaking 30-day wellness challenges, and promoting his minimalist lifestyle.
In life that was meticulously controlled, having kids changed everything.
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Blessed with a baby who woke every 30 minutes for the first ten months of their life, Matt chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about how becoming a new parent impacted every facet of his life.
Hugh and Josh share just how lonely they have felt at different times during their parenting journey, and Ryan saves the day by holding a baby for a full 40 minutes (save the applause! please!)
Matt this was a dream come true.
To watch the full episode on YouTube - https://youtu.be/foilZTRGXco
00:00 - I Tried Being Vulnerable for 30 Days
7:03 - Minimalism Maxxing
18:00 - The Vulnerabilitea House
20:25 - Becoming a father, losing sleep (and himself)
24:14 - Depression Diagnosis Wake-Up Call
32:56 - Hugh's Sleep Score
40:38 - SOS: Hiring Help, Expanding your Village
48:50 - Sleep Training: What Actually Works
52:02 - The Real Cost of Sleep Deprivation
58:29 - Being A Mum: The Additional Burden
1:01:32 - 'Do You Regret Having Kids?'
1:04:00 - The New and Improved Matt D'Ad-Avella
🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode
Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby… New Brain… Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4zVt9Si
📺 Things to watch
Minimalism Documentary - https://bit.ly/3SSZb0t
Why I disappeared - Matt D’Avella - https://bit.ly/3SwYA4g
Matt D’Avella YouTube - https://bit.ly/4wOzFXW
💤 Things to sleep train
Tresillian Sleep Organisation - https://bit.ly/4zAGTS5
The Ferber Sleep method - https://bit.ly/4iCdqB4
Masada Sleep School - https://bit.ly/4qNi7uc
📚Things to read
Regretful Parents subreddit - https://bit.ly/4gx9W0b
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

How does having cancer as a child impact the way you live as an adult?
Uber successful chef and restauranteur Josh Niland doesn’t do things in halves (no, literally, have you read his book The Whole Fish?).
From opening a restaurant at 26, to becoming the first Australian to win the James Beard Book of the Year award when he was just 30, Josh’s creativity came from a place of desperation to explore every opportunity presented to him.
💌Join 9,400+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
Diagnosed with cancer 2 days after his 8th birthday, Josh’s childhood transformed in a matter of hours into hospital hallways, chemotherapy and facing his own mortality.
In this episode, Josh joins us in the Vulnerabilitea House to talk us through an experience which profoundly changed him, which he is now grateful for.
Hugh, Ryan and Josh (our Josh), also ask about where his drive and ambitious creativity comes from, and just how close to failure Josh’s culinary career came.
We wish this chat could have gone on longer,
If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/hjZPPeKKsVA
🫖Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned on this episode
Nathan Cavaleri - The Ups & The Blues - https://bit.ly/468HE7l
📺 Things to watch
Josh’s Australian Story - https://bit.ly/4giDtKR
📚Things to read
Saint Peter: Chapter & Verse, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN
The Whole Fish, by Josh Niland - https://bit.ly/4bVM0SN
🍽️ Places to eat
Saint Peter - https://bit.ly/4qrs4gv
💻Things to check out
Starlight Children’s Foundation - https://bit.ly/4hHDkmM
Josh Niland’s Website - https://www.mrniland.com
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is tough love to blame for our shame?
💌Join 9,200+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy
We all know that parent or coach on the sideline who takes under 10’s basketball a liiitttllleee too seriously. And occasionally, tough love might seem to work in the moment, long term, the shame train isn’t going anywhere good.
Dr Emily, our resident psychologist, is here to name the shame to tame it, and teach us how we can be shame strippers too (get your head out of the gutter. Shame on you).
We go into the difference between shame, humiliation, guilt and embarrassment, bow down to the queen Brene Brown, and introduce ourselves to our own Healthy Adult.
Shamelessly, this is one of our best episodes to date.
0:00 – Ever heard of a shame stripper?
6:27 – Bow down to Brene Brown
12:25 – The other self-conscious emotions (they’re shy)
20:51 – Humour and humiliation
29:21 – Shame is a full body experience
36:16 – Beware of who you share (with)
40:43 – Manosphere + behaviour change
46:59 – Tough love + kids sport
57:07 – Working with shame
1:06:10 – Bring on the compassion!
1:10:07 – Introducing the Healthy Adult
If you’d like to watch the full episode on YouTube, follow this link -
🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Ryan Shelton - Shame, Jealousy & Purpose - https://bit.ly/4qgEqrO
Dr Emily - Compassion of The Self - https://bit.ly/4hqWa1k
How do you know you’re in a thinking trap? - Maria Ruberto - https://bit.ly/4ze4eJh
🎧 Things to listen to
Between Two Beers with Steven Adams - https://bit.ly/4g3wipS
📚Things to read
Daring Greatly, by Brene Brown - https://bit.ly/45VT2Dx
The Compassionate Mind, by Paul Gilbert - https://bit.ly/3UewPOq
Movember study of the Manosphere - https://bit.ly/4wZxtOs
Proneness to shame vs proneness to guilt research by Tangney et al. - https://bit.ly/4g4lQyl
📖Things to do
The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook, by Kristin Neff and Christopher Germer - https://bit.ly/4zg353K
Othership (breath work app) - https://bit.ly/4g7Q03E
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Can nature help us to feel less alone?
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Psychologist on the incredible, Alone Australia series (remember our seminal episode with Gina Chick?), Mark Mathieson is in the Academy of Imperfection to help us understand how nature regulates our body, and how we can reconnect to it in this digital age.
Mark talks about how to uncover the person behind the persona, the science behind gardening, and why Hugh had the best sleep of his life in a tent, with no pillow.
According to Mark, human are immensely capable of change, and this episode provides a few things we can do to ensure nature is incorporated into our routines, without cramming the schedule more.
Mark, it was great to be alone . . . with you.
If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIMSSRJg2vQ

0:00 – Ice breaker: where have we gone wrong?6:58 – The segmentation of exercise11:46 – Evolution of Mark18:53 – Person behind the persona24:10 – Our virtual reality future27:22 – Let’s learn to adapt36:00 – Building relationships with nature42:28 – The science of gardening and sunshine48:53 – Eventually, reality TV gets us all53:08 – Big city blues
🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode
Gina Chick - Don’t Fight Life - https://bit.ly/4xj0kga
Sean Turnell - A Prisoner’s Guide to Life - https://bit.ly/4btNKCu
Sex for Normal People with Ita O’Brien - https://bit.ly/4btNNya
Dr Emily - The (pesky) Hedonistic Treadmill - https://bit.ly/4yXxx2B
Dr Paul Callaghan - How To Follow The Dreaming Path - https://bit.ly/457l9PY
📚Things to read
Comfort Crisis, by Michael Easter - https://bit.ly/4pV10Ga
The Dreaming Path, by Dr Paul Callaghan and Uncle Paul Gordon - https://bit.ly/4gctqrZ
📺 Things to watch
Alone Australia (new season out now) - https://bit.ly/4yWVW8n
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects
All views expressed in this podcast are Mark Mathieson’s and not representative of the Department of Defence, Australia.
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What is racism, really?
💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/
Adam Briggs, rapper, writer, actor, senator and Yorta-Yorta man, joins Hugh, Josh and guest host Nazeem Hussain, to have an honest conversation about racism in Australia.
We explore the impact of The Voice Referendum vote, how culture and community impacts identity, and why Briggs has never, ever felt the need to people please (yep, that’s the sound of us frantically scribbling down notes).
Briggs also chats about the highs and lows of bipolar II.

0:00 – No boundaries Briggs
5:26 –Big Shep’ Washing Machine
12:25 – This is racism
21:27 – A hyper-vigilante
28:06 – Perfect storm for art
36:09 – Copping it Australia Wide
43:22 – The Yes Vote
53:08 – Australian Culture
57:02 – Never just about music
1:04:50 – Make Aboriginal Cool
1:09:19 – Bipolar, therapy, training
🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode
Ben Shewry (Pt 1) - The Other Side of Excellence - https://bit.ly/4fErGpQ
Ben Shewry (Pt 2) - How The Chef Was Made - https://bit.ly/45sPsR7
Ben Shewry - Making It Right (And Delicious) - https://bit.ly/4gXyDEZ
Nazeem Hussain - Losing a Parent - https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/the-imperfects/id1476501557?i=1000589981824
🎧Things to listen to
Big Noter - https://www.thebignoter.com
The Children Came Back by Briggs & Gurrumul - https://bit.ly/4fGaxMH
📺Things to watch
Briggs’s Voice Referendum ad - https://bit.ly/4bkiTs2
📚Things to read
Our Home, Our Heartbeat by Adam Briggs - https://bit.ly/4yQKbjW
💻Things to check out
Rumbalara Football Netball Club - https://www.rfnc.com.au/
Bad Apples Music - https://bit.ly/4x8Rdi3
🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz
🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW
🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - https://www.patreon.com/c/TheImperfects
🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects
The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.