No Guilt Mom | Overcoming Mom Guilt, Mental Load & Parenting Tips for Moms

If you've ever felt the weight of the mental load and wondered why you feel like you've lost yourself since becoming a mom, this episode is for you.

Pediatrician Dr. Brian Temple has spent 20 years watching what happens to parents who have run out of capacity. Amanda Tice, a curve model, best-selling author and former TV journalist, has lived it. Together they co-host the podcast Between Pickups, and in this conversation they talk about identity loss, why kindergarten drop-off can hit harder than the newborn days, and how to start coming back to yourself without guilt.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why identity loss often hits hardest around kindergarten, not in the newborn months

What a pediatrician sees when a mom is reaching her capacity

Amanda's "affair with your old self," and why your hobby doesn't have to be meaningful to anyone but you

Why adding something for yourself can make the rest of life feel lighter

What changes when a mom gets away, and how to ask for the time without guilt

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Dr. Temple and Amanda's podcast, Between Pickups: betweenpickups.com

Amanda's book, The New Mom Code: Shatter Expectations and Crush It at Motherhood

Take things off your plate with the Happy Home Ladder

Get support with other moms in the No Guilt Mom Inner Circle

JoAnn's book, The Best Mom is a Happy Mom

More episodes on the No Guilt Mom podcast page

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If you've ever dealt with mom guilt after losing your cool and wondered why you can't stay calm with your ADHD kid, this episode is for you.

You get interrupted, your emotions go from zero to 100, and then the guilt shows up. In this solo episode, JoAnn shares how ADHD shaped her own childhood and parenting, why big emotional reactions are not a verdict on you as a mom, and how to start noticing your triggers so you can pause and repair.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why ADHD comes with an emotional component, and why a big reaction to criticism is not proof that you are a bad mom

Why being pulled away from a project can drain your motivation, and how interest works as fuel for an ADHD brain

Why you can't promise to always stay calm, but you can promise to notice your triggers and repair

How to tell your family your triggers, and how to plan a pause for the situations that set you off

A simple trick to stay present in a conversation when your attention wants to wander

Resources mentioned in this episode:

The Happy Home Ladder, a cooperative family game where you work on one skill at a time

The Best Mom is a Happy Mom by JoAnn Crohn

The No Guilt Mom Inner Circle

Vibe by Adam Grant

The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins

The No Guilt Mom podcast page

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Thank you to T Town Homeschooler for the kind review! If this episode helped you, leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It only takes a minute and it helps other moms find the show.
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If you've ever felt the weight of the mental load and wondered why you always seem to do everything at home, this episode is for you.

You say yes to the plan, your partner says yes to the plan, and then somehow you are the one who is disappointed. Julia Dhar, a world champion debater and author of How Change Really Works, joins me to show you how to have the hard conversation without it turning into a fight. We talk about making a clear and specific request, why false agreement quietly builds resentment, and what to do when you catch yourself thinking "I thought you were going to."

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why anticipating a conflict feels so physical, and why most people say they feel relieved after the hard conversation

How to make a clear and specific request instead of asking "can you help me?"

The difference between false alignment and true agreement, and how true agreement lowers your mental load

Why "I thought you were going to" is an early warning sign that your expectations and theirs are out of step

The "I don't care / I care a lot" technique for letting small things go without losing yourself

Resources mentioned in this episode:

How Change Really Works by Julia Dhar

Happy Home Ladder

No Guilt Mom Inner Circle

The Best Mom is a Happy Mom by JoAnn Crohn

noguiltmom.com

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If you've ever felt the weight of the mental load and wondered why you keep doing everything yourself, even when you're exhausted, this episode is for you.

You're not tired from the tasks on your plate. You're tired from the parts of the job nobody can see: the noticing before and the checking after. In this episode, I share the research behind that invisible work, a few of my own stories (including moments where I got it wrong), and a simple way to hand over the whole job, not just one more task.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why the heaviest part of your load is the part nobody can see

The four stages of every household job and which ones moms tend to hold

What I call the default loop, and why it keeps you doing it all

Why taking a job back costs you more than it saves (my holiday gift-wrapping story)

How to hand over the whole job this week, and why their frustration is part of the learning

Resources mentioned in this episode:

The Happy Home Ladder: a cooperative family game that does the asking for you

No Guilt Mom Inner Circle

The Best Mom is a Happy Mom

Tell me which job you're handing off: @noguiltmom on Instagram

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If you've ever felt the weight of the mental load and wondered why you're the only one who notices what needs to be done around the house, this episode is for you.

Sam Kelly, author of Notice and Do, joins me to talk about the moment she realized she was teaching her kids to rely on her for all the noticing, just like her husband had. We talk about the rage that comes with carrying the mental load, why a chore system only gets you half of the way there, and how to hand over ownership without hovering.

In this episode, you'll learn:

Why noticing is a teachable skill, just like brushing your teeth or tying your shoes

How to turn grief and rage about the mental load into fuel for change

What the Big Three and learning ladders are, and how they give kids real ownership

Why a chore chart relies on you to do all the noticing and delegating, and what to do instead

How pre-existing motivators work for strong-willed and ADHD kids, and why the pushback is temporary

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load by Sam Kelly

Sam Kelly's website

Sam Kelly on Instagram (@samkelly_world)

Happy Home Ladder

No Guilt Mom Inner Circle

The Best Mom is a Happy Mom by JoAnn Crohn

No Guilt Mom podcast page

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