Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

I met Stacey Lindsay about a decade ago and worked with her for a few years—she’s a curious, compassionate journalist and writer—but I didn’t know much of her own incredible personal story until I read her new book Being 40 and had this conversation with her. We talked about the meaning of this decade of our lives, but more broadly, we talked about the scripts and checklists that women are often handed throughout our lives—and how we go about setting these down, centering ourselves, and self-authoring. We talked about being disappointed by the people we love, about forgiveness, about breaking cycles, and about the people we want to become next.

For the show notes, head to my Substack.

In 2018, health and science journalist Alexandra Sifferlin began her investigation into the American diagnosis crisis: Why are so many people being misdiagnosed? What is the cost of this error? Who is trying to change the system—and what does a better healthcare system (for all of us) look like? The resulting book—The Elusive Body—is a fascinating read. Today, we cover the major parts of Sifferlin’s investigation and what’s unfolded even since she finished writing.

For the show notes, head to my Substack.

I had some personal highs this April, and also a strange feeling (for me, someone who is constantly in motion, always moving forward) of being a bit unmoored—a reminder of needing to wait, of letting cycles be, of accepting stillness (or trying to, at least). I’ve also been thinking of a (related) Carissa Schumacher metaphor—the idea that each of us prefers a different part of the cycles of life: seeding, growing, or harvesting. I’m reflecting on all of this—and a few other new things that have become very meaningful to me—in this month’s solo episode.

For the show notes, head to my Substack.

In her moving and beautiful book, When We See You Again, Rachel Goldberg-Polin writes about her love for her son, Hersh, who was stolen from a musical festival on October 7, 2023, and executed after 328 days of being held hostage. While I completely understand the instinct to turn away, I also really hope you will stay with us for this conversation, if you can. Rachel is incredible, and there are so many gifts to be found in her words. She told me stories that made me laugh, that stunned me, that were utterly profound, and that will stay with me forever. If you have ever wondered why we’re here—or what your “why” is—I think you will also be changed by Rachel, too.

For the show notes, head to my Substack.

Psychiatrist Amir Levine, MD, is the coauthor of the mega-bestseller Attached. In his new book, Secure, he takes another look at the four attachment styles and the myths surrounding them to show how each of us—regardless of our starting point—can flex and become more secure in our relationships. In this (delightful) conversation, he also explains why certain seemingly insignificant minor interactions (which he calls SIMIs) have an outsize effect on our brains and our intimate relationships. He offers some advice for turning down the volume on the insecure attachments in your life. And we talk about more psychological phenomena that I think will resonate with many of you—from attachment gaslighting to the protest-regret cycle.

For the show notes, head to my Substack.
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